Courtroom Etiquette Guide

Why courtroom etiquette matters

Judges do not expect self-represented litigants to behave like lawyers. They do, however, expect basic courtesy, respect for the process, and a genuine effort to follow court procedures. Demonstrating these qualities — even imperfectly — goes a long way.

• First impressions are lasting — arriving on time, dressing appropriately, and knowing how to address the court signals that you are prepared and taking proceedings seriously.
• Professionalism builds credibility — when you behave professionally, the court is more likely to view your evidence and submissions favourably. Poor etiquette undermines even the strongest case.
• Etiquette levels the playing field — lawyers know courtroom protocol instinctively. As a self-represented litigant, understanding these conventions removes one potential disadvantage.

How to address the court

Knowing how to address judicial officers correctly is one of the simplest ways to demonstrate respect and preparedness. Getting it wrong is not fatal, but getting it right sets a professional tone from the outset.

Opening your submissions

When it is your turn to speak, stand and begin with "May it please the court" followed by your name: "May it please the court, my name is [your full name] and I am the applicant/respondent in this matter, appearing for myself." This is the standard opening and shows the court you understand the formalities.

When to stand

Always stand when the judge enters or leaves the courtroom, when you are speaking to the judge, and when the judge is speaking directly to you. If you are unsure, watch what others do — particularly any lawyers present. When in doubt, stand.

Dress code for family court

There is no strict uniform requirement for parties appearing in family court, but how you dress communicates respect for the court and the seriousness with which you regard proceedings. Business casual is the minimum standard.

Appropriate attire

• Collared shirt or blouse
• Trousers, chinos, or knee-length skirt
• Closed-toe shoes (leather or similar)
• Neat, clean, and pressed clothing
• Minimal, understated jewellery

Avoid wearing

• Thongs, sandals, or open-toe shoes
• Singlets, tank tops, or shorts
• Clothing with logos, slogans, or graphics
• Ripped or heavily faded denim
• Excessive jewellery or strong fragrances

Courtroom do's and don'ts

These are the fundamental rules of courtroom conduct. Many are common sense, but knowing them in advance means you can focus entirely on presenting your case rather than worrying about protocol.

Do

• Arrive at least 30 minutes early — this allows time to find the courtroom, check the daily court list, speak with the duty lawyer if needed, and compose yourself before proceedings begin.
• Turn off your mobile phone — switch to silent or turn off completely before entering the courtroom. A ringing phone during proceedings is disruptive and disrespectful.
• Stand when the judge enters and leaves — when the judge enters, everyone in the courtroom stands. Remain standing until the judge sits, and repeat when the judge rises to leave.
• Bow when entering and leaving the courtroom — a brief nod or slight bow towards the bench when you enter and leave is customary, even if the judge is not yet present.

Don't

• Don't interrupt anyone — never interrupt the judge, the other party, or their lawyer. Make a note of anything you need to respond to and raise it when it is your turn.
• Don't speak over the judge — if the judge begins speaking while you are talking, stop immediately and listen. The judge controls the flow of proceedings.
• Don't argue directly with the other party — all communication in the courtroom goes through the judge. Direct exchanges between parties are not permitted and will be stopped.

Handling nerves and emotions

It is entirely normal to feel nervous, anxious, or emotional in family court. These proceedings involve deeply personal matters — your children, your home, your future. Judges understand this. The goal is not to suppress your emotions entirely, but to manage them so they don't interfere with your ability to present your case clearly.

• Practise breathing techniques — before entering the courtroom, take several slow, deep breaths — inhale for four counts, hold for four, exhale for four. This activates your parasympathetic nervous system and reduces the fight-or-flight response. Repeat during proceedings whenever you feel tension rising.
• Prepare thorough notes — having well-organised notes gives you a safety net. If nerves cause you to lose your train of thought, your notes bring you back. Write down your key points, the orders you are seeking, and any responses you anticipate needing to make.
• Ask the court to repeat something — if you miss something, you can politely say: "Your Honour, could you please repeat that?" This is entirely acceptable and far preferable to guessing or nodding along without understanding.

Common mistakes self-represented litigants make

These mistakes are surprisingly common and entirely avoidable. Being aware of them before your hearing means you won't make them yourself.

• Addressing the judge informally — calling the judge "mate", "sir", "ma'am", or simply "judge" is one of the most common errors. The correct form of address is always "Your Honour". While judges will generally correct you politely, it creates an immediately poor impression.
• Interrupting the other party — when the other party says something you disagree with, the instinct to interrupt is strong. Resist it. Interrupting suggests you cannot control yourself and weakens your credibility.
• Making facial expressions or gestures — eye-rolling, head-shaking, sighing audibly, or making dismissive gestures while the other party speaks is noticed by judges — even when you think it is not. It is treated as disrespectful and can undermine the court's view of your character.
• Bringing unsolicited material — turning up with documents the court has not been given prior notice of, or that have not been filed and served, will generally not be accepted. Attempting to "ambush" with new evidence reflects poorly on you.
• Bringing support people into restricted areas — your support person can sit in the courtroom gallery, but they cannot sit at the bar table with you, approach the bench, or enter the witness box area unless the court grants specific permission.

Speaking and presenting your case

How you communicate in court is just as important as what you communicate. Clear, measured, and respectful speech — directed through the bench — is the foundation of effective self-representation.

• Speak clearly and at a measured pace — nerves often cause people to speak too quickly. Consciously slow down. The judge may be taking notes, and the court associate may be recording proceedings. Speak at a pace that allows each point to land clearly.
• Address all remarks through the bench — everything you say in court is directed to the judge, not to the other party. Even when referring to what the other party has done or said, you speak to the judge: "Your Honour, the respondent has failed to comply with..." — not "You didn't follow the orders."
• Refer to yourself and the other party correctly — refer to yourself in the first person: "I submit that..." or "In my affidavit at paragraph 12, I stated..." Refer to the other party by their surname ("Mr Smith" or "Ms Jones") or by their role ("the applicant" or "the respondent"). Avoid first names or informal references.
• Organise your documents — have your documents organised with tabs, page numbers, or bookmarks so you can locate what you need quickly. Fumbling through unorganised papers wastes the court's time and creates a disorganised impression.

Technology and devices in court

Courts have strict rules about the use of electronic devices during proceedings. Violating these rules can result in your device being confiscated, or in serious cases, a finding of contempt of court.

• Mobile phones — must be switched to silent or turned off before entering the courtroom. Do not make calls, send texts, check notifications, or browse during proceedings. If you are expecting an urgent call, inform the court associate before proceedings begin.
• Laptops and tablets — may be permitted for the purpose of referring to notes or documents. Ask the judge for permission before using one: "Your Honour, may I use my laptop to refer to my notes?" Do not assume permission is granted.
• Recording devices — audio and video recording of court proceedings is strictly prohibited without express permission from the court. This includes using your phone to record, taking photographs, or live-streaming. Breaching this rule can result in contempt proceedings.
• Social media — do not post about your court proceedings on social media. Family court proceedings are generally subject to publication restrictions under section 121 of the Family Law Act 1975. Publishing details that identify parties or children is a criminal offence.

Common questions